Monday, June 14, 2010
Captivating your Husband.
Insert From today's challenge from Women Living Well
Proverbs 5:18b&19 tells husbands "May you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer - may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love."
The Webster definition of captivate is: to capture the attention or affection of, as by beauty and excellence; fascinate; charm
Do you remember when your husband was first captivated by you? He saw you as beautiful and excellent. You fascinated him. Your eyes twinkled, you smiled with each thought of him, you bonded over long conversations of who you both were and dreamed to be.
But I wonder, are you still captivating or has pleasing, pursuing, touching, loving, listening and feeding you relationship been lost somewhere in the busy shuffle of life?
It's Week #1 of the Completing Him Challenge. If you are a blogger - share your dating pictures and story (save the wedding ones for next week!).
Consider: How much time do you spend on a daily/weekly basis cultivating your marriage now? In what ways can you regain some of what has been lost in the daily shuffle of life?
Purpose this week to do something that reminds your husband of the youthful wife you once were - maybe it's wearing something you know he loves on you (remember we dressed to please back in those dating days!), go somewhere you both used to enjoy going together - alone!, look at photos together of the "good ol'days", watch a favorite movie, or just simply sit together talking, listening, dreaming, holding hands, rubbing his back, and simply paying attention to the amazing husband of your youth! Treasure him this week!
Here's is our dating story.
Gabe and I met for the first time long ago in a galaxy far far away.... that is how my husband described it when I asked him. We actually met in 2001 when I was newly out of college and I had my 2nd job in my field at Methodist Hospital in San Antonio. He had also been an xray tech for some time already. He was on 3rd shift and I was on 2nd shift. The first time I met him I asked him, "What are you?" I had no manners I guess. My husbands is very ethnic looking and I couldn't figure out what nationality he was. His response was, "and you are?"
He was the first tech to take me under his wing and teach me so much about our field. He always seemed to show up for overtime on my shift in the part of the hospital I was working in and always at the right time. I would be in the middle of a trauma and he would be right their to help.
He kinda tried to asked my out after he tried and succeeded to kiss me for the first time in the Children's ER. I said no because we co-workers and it would just be complicated. So we stayed good friends and hung out from time to time. We lost touch in the later part of 2002. Alot happened in my personal journey after that and we come to April 2005. I received a wonderful and sweet letter in the mail 3 weeks after I had just given birth to my son Jared. Honestly when I saw the letter I didn't even remember his name. I had recently FINALLY gotten out of a crazy controlling relationship with Jared's bio dad and the last thing in the world I was looking for was someone to date or marry. He said in the letter then he continued to think about me from time to time through out the years.
I called him that day and he called me back soon after that. He had found me through our license website that only RT's can go on.
We only talked at midnight for awhile because Jared was my first priority and Gabe knew that. I was surprised he wanted to still talk to me after he knew I had a newborn. Midnight was Jared's first feeding of the night. My time was spent with Jared in the evening and not anyone else. I wasn't looking for a "daddy" for Jared, and I was being very cautious. Gabe respected that and never pushed me to do anything. He just loved Jared from the get go and never looked back.
I wanted to baptized Jared down in San Antonio where I was from but I didn't want to drive by myself down there. Gabe offered to fly to where I was and then drive me back down. How sweet. We met again for the first time May 20, 2005 when I picked him up at the airport. That was also the first time he met Jared in person.
We had the best weekend together down in San Antonio. I stayed with some friends. We had our first "date" with Jared of course at Texas state Roadhouse in downtown San Antonio. It was awesome and we connected again so easily like we were meant to be just at a different time in life. He was there Sunday morning for Jared's baptism. I wanted him in the picture with me but he wouldn't. He was just being so sweet and always so protective of the both of us. He actually took the pictures.
A wedding we went to while we where dating
Our first time going to church together while we were dating.
A lazy Saturday morning at my parents house.
Our first date without Jared in Plainview.
He drove from San Antonio 5 weekends in a row to my house ( 8 hrs one way) and spent time with my parents, Jared and I. We only had a few dates just him because of having Jared already. We had a great time always the 3 of us as well. I love that he got to be around my parents as much as he did because they both got to know each other so well and Gabe was comfortable from the get go. Him and I are 100% day/night. He just became one of the family. I was so thankful my parents let him come every weekend and even after he moved to Dalhart to be closer to us. He loved cooking for all of us and helped around the house as well. I love seeing the bond he had especially with my momma. That was the best. I used to kid that she rolled out the red carpet when he came to the house. He always kissed her on her forehead when he greeted her with a big hug as well. I loved how is was always making us laugh so much. My husband can be very quiet so to see him so comfortable and relaxed around my folks was the best. He got to know my family and friends pretty quickly. My brother had told me since I had my kid first ( don't recommend it but never take it back of course) that I will get to see if he would be a good "daddy."
My Mother wanted to call him daddy Gabe already a month after we had been dating. I said not yet. I didn't want to do that.. I wasn't trying to find a daddy for Jared. I wanted the Man that the Lord had picked for me and Jared. Well soon after the Lord was clear that Gabe was the one for me.
We had the BEST time dating. We had to work harder at staying connected because we only dated on the weekends. We even broke up for a month and said we wouldn't call each other. I lasted a week I think and I couldn't stand it anymore. We started slow again and knew we were meant to be.
One of my favorites of gabe and Jared when we were dating.
I plan to skype with him tonight because he works far away during the week.. but just for this week, 4 more days. His contract ends on Friday.
We really had to work harder because we are not together during the week only on the weekend. I love that he calls me at least 4 times a day.
I love that we are still very touchy feely.. I love that we are so connected always in church together. We don't get much time together just us, so when we get to worship together with the kids in the nursery it is so nice. I love how he always has his arm around me and I lean on his shoulder from time to time. I have had people comment on how we still look like newlyweds. I treasure those times especially when he is gone during the week. The best date we can have is worshiping the Lord together.
I do have to admit I failed big time this past Sunday. I am going to be gone on Father's day.. which really sucks but I am leaving to go be with my family to spread my mom's ashes. I didn't know it feel on Father's day weekend until later. We were all going to go but we could only afford for me to go.
So we decided to celebrate Father's day this past Sunday. I was going to make my new recipe Smothered Pork chops and salad. I was going to make a cake but I made brownies instead. So I was doing a project that I was trying to get done as fast as I could so I could go do it without having the boys with me. I did take too long and was still going to cook the meal. I got home and Gabe said what about Father's day? I felt terrible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I planning something special for him when he gets home on Friday evening. Jared and I are going to make his cake and special dinner for sure. I tried out the meal this evening and it was awesome. The boys are going to make a special project for him as well.
Right now the biggest thing is my husbands job is ending this week and he is up for a few jobs and we have been praying about which one is the one the Lord wants. I would love to move to Fort Worth but my fabulous husband reminded me that the Lord gave us this fabulous house and would it be right to just give it up like that? He would have to commute to the one he is leaning towards. I just want to be supportive to what ever the Lord decides for us and be Gabe's helper the whole way.